I didn’t feel like it.
Told myself I’d wait.
Until I felt like doing it.
When I had clarity.
When I felt motivated.
When I was aligned.
When it felt right.
When I felt right.
Clarity. Motivation. Alignment.
They’re not requirements.
They’re results.
They happen after.
After I take the action.
After I risk.
After I lead.
Actions lead, they don’t follow.
I never feel like doing anything.
I think of something.
Then, I either feel good about it.
Or I don’t.
When I do, the story is I feel like doing it.
When I don’t, the story is I don’t feel like doing it.
Then, I either do it.
Or I don’t.
Regardless of the story.
Regardless of my feelings.
Feelings don’t drive my actions.
They are a signal of my mental state.
When I act the way I want to feel,
the feelings catch up.
Sure, it can be easier when everything is aligned.
It isn’t a guarantee.
I felt like running without leaving my couch.
It can be harder when they aren’t.
That’s the work.
That’s redeeming work.
To act as I want to become.
A demonstration of faith.
Faithful to the person I want to become,
before I feel like being him.
Even when I don’t feel like being him.