When and then is a story. A story we make up, mostly about how we put things in order. A story we tell about the order of things, mostly TO ourselves.

When I do this, then I’ll get that.
When I do that, then I’ll get this.
When I do this, then I won’t get that.
When I do that, then I won’t get this.

Or told in reverse…

When I don’t do this, then I’ll get that.
When I don’t do that, then I’ll get this.
When I don’t do this, then I won’t get that.
When I don’t do that, then I won’t get this.

Same story, about you …

When you do this, then you’ll get that.
When you do that, then you’ll get this.
When you don’t do this, then you’ll get that.
When you don’t do that, then you’ll get this.
When you do this, then you won’t get that.
When you do that, then you won’t get this.
When you don’t do this, then you won’t get that.
When you don’t do that, then you won’t get this.

Or told about me and you …

When I do this, then you’ll get that.
When I do that, then you’ll get this.
When I don’t do this, then you’ll get that.
When I don’t do that, then you’ll get this.
When I do this, then you won’t get that.
When I do that, then you won’t get this.
When I don’t do this, then you won’t get that.
When I don’t do that, then you won’t get this.

Same story, about you and me …

When you do this, then I’ll get that.
When you do that, then I’ll get this.
When you don’t do this, then I’ll get that.
When you don’t do that, then I’ll get this.
When you do this, then I won’t get that.
When you do that, then I won’t get this.
When you don’t do this, then I won’t get that.
When you don’t do that, then I won’t get this.

Same story, looking back … when I did this, then I got that.
Same story, about us … when we do this, then we’ll get that.
Same story, about us looking back … when we did this, then we got that.

And we’re just getting started with the number of combinations and possibilities.

With all of these whens and thens, it’s easy to forget who’s really putting things in order.